Differences Between Resentment And Resentment

Are resentment the same as resentment? When we hear these words, we tend to immediately think about the harm that other people have caused us and the reaction that that harm has caused us. However, although they may seem similar concepts, they are not exactly the same : in this article we will know the differences between resentment and resentment.

To delve a little more into the subject, anticipate that we feel resentment when someone does something that we do not like, hurts or offends us. However, resentment goes beyond resentment ; it usually hides a desire for revenge, and it is a more intense and destructive feeling. How else are they different? How can we free ourselves from these feelings? We reveal everything, here!

What are resentment and resentment?

Before delving into the differences between resentment and resentment, let’s get to know, roughly, what each concept means. The RAE (Royal Spanish Academy) defines resentment as ‘deep-rooted and tenacious resentment’. Instead, resentment would be ‘the action and effect of resenting’ and resenting means ‘having a feeling, regret or anger about something’.

The resentment refers to a feeling of hostility or great resentment towards someone, because of an offense or damage received. In the case of resentment, we speak of a persistent feeling of disgust or anger towards someone because they consider it the cause of a certain offense or damage suffered. That is, the causes of both feelings could be the same, although the concepts differ slightly from each other.

Differences between resentment and resentment

As we can see, these are slightly different concepts. Without further ado, let’s learn the differences between resentment and resentment:

• Degree of intensity : resentment is a much more intense feeling than resentment.
• Duration : resentment is a more lasting state than resentment, the latter being somewhat more punctual in time.
• Depth : another of the differences between resentment and resentment is its degree of depth; resentment is something much deeper than resentment.
• Causes : Although the causes can be similar, usually the resentment is unleashed by more serious situations than those that originate the resentment.
• Consequences : prolonged resentment can have much more damaging consequences for our physical and mental health than resentment, as well as producing greater interference in our lives.

Let’s give some examples

To better illustrate the differences between grudge and resentment, let’s think of a few examples. Let’s imagine that a person has killed someone very dear to us (a very serious situation), the resentment towards that person appears. This feeling is intense and deep and if it is not addressed or managed, it is usually very long-lasting over time.

In the case of resentment, imagine that a friend of ours does not invite us to his birthday party or wedding. As a result of this situation, we may develop resentment towards that person. That is, we would be resentful with “X” person. As we can see, the situation is not as serious as in the previous case, although it can also be annoying or harmful to us. In this case, in addition, resentment is usually less intense than resentment and less lasting over time.

It’s hard to be angry with someone your whole life because they didn’t invite us to a party, right? Instead, we can hate for a lifetime a person who killed a loved one of ours, and that is what resentment is all about.

How to overcome these feelings?

Although each case must be analyzed and approached in a personalized way, and taking into account that feeling resentment is not the same as resentment, we leave you some general guidelines to address these negative feelings. Although there are no “positive or negative” emotions, because they all have their function, getting away from these kinds of feelings can bring us a good dose of well-being and liberation.

The first thing we must be clear about is that identifying emotions allows us to start working to understand them. How I feel? And because? In other words, detecting resentment and resentment (how it manifests in our body, in our mind, in our way of relating …) and analyzing its cause, can help us free ourselves from them in the future.

Once the feeling and its cause have been detected, we can try to find a way to express what we feel. We can talk about it with the person who caused us harm, introduce it into our inner dialogue in a restorative way or write it in a letter, for example.

Work on forgiveness

Any of the aforementioned strategies can bring us closer to  forgiveness, or what is the same, to the liberation of resentment or resentment. Forgiving is often the end of a job in which the final step is acceptance. With forgiveness we free ourselves from the negative feelings associated with what caused us so much suffering; it is, in a way, a way of making peace with the past, with the other and with ourselves.

However, forgiving (either oneself or another) is an act as liberating as it is difficult to carry out. Therefore, many times a good option will be to go to psychological therapy, to be able to manage all these emotions and past conflicts.